I need a new route for my routine. I need to rout the ruinous behavior(s) that have ravaged my routine and reduced my writing to rubble. I need to put a stop to the ransack of my energy and repair the wreckage of what remains of my confidence.
Here I go again, associating words that on the surface have no direct relationship to each other outside my unique philosophical bent. That’s okay. According to Mark David Gerson in his book, The Voice of the Muse, “Words are your teachers. Don’t run from your words (…). Let them teach you all they have to teach you.”
And still the words just keep coming. Sabotage, interruption, interference, impairment.
Muse: Stop fighting yourself.
Surrender. Submit. Give up. Give in. Admit defeat. Yield.
Muse: You are a writer.
Alright then. You’re right. I am a writer. Like a completely accidental misfiring, I have to quit shooting myself in the proverbial foot. I will not be injured. I will not take myself out of this game. No. There is no slip-up here, no misstep, no mistake. I want to write. I have to write.
Muse: Don’t be afraid.
Me: I’m terrified.