Heavy Mettle

How does the serious writer deal with the lack of time and energy to attend to the business of writing when a personal crisis of the family-type sucks up so much time that the said serious writer is unable to attend to said business???

This personal crisis requires monumental spiritual courage. I can manage the ebb and flow of the “why is this happening” waves of pity and recovery. I look forward to the end point of this most recent crisis (more will come…thanks to the nature of chronic illness). I can manage almost anything my daughter’s illness throws at me without excessive emotion with one exception.

I confess; I get very weepy when I mourn the time away from writing. I know this sounds horrible but sometimes I’m resentful. And then I feel guilty for putting my selfish needs before the needs of my beloved child. And then I get weepy again…for all kinds of reasons. It’s a cycle of the most vicious kind. Trust me on this.

Anyway, it’s been almost a month since I’ve had the luxury of sitting at my computer, consumed with angst about what to say/write next. Gee…I miss all that nail-biting and self-doubt that accompanies my writing routine (sigh).

Muse: I miss you. Take care of your daughter.

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